arukou | Entries tagged with steve rogers

(In response to a long tumblr thread about Cap and Wonder Woman and their meeting in WWII)

I am reminded that immediately after seeing Wonder Woman, I really wanted to write a fic with her and Steve in some way, shippy or otherwise. I mean, we know Diana is canonically bi, so we can even have a lovely threesome with Peggy, or they can just be friends, or she and Peggy can be together and Steve can sigh after them both. There are just so many possibilities. But I think she’d be good for him. The fact that she chooses love, that she chooses hope, I think that would be really good for Steve. He’s already a jaded little cuss even before he joins the army, and then going in and having to see what war has done to Bucky, to his men, I think the light Diana could show him would be something he’d really latch onto, a way of looking at the world that wasn’t completely hopeless or angry. Imagine what good it would’ve done him coming out of the ice, to have a little of that hope, especially if it were magnified by her finding him again.

“I heard there was a man in the ice.”

“Ma’am, who are you? You can’t just–”

Fury: “Yes, she can.”

Steve: “Diana?”

(And then likemymask said: To derail a bit, would that mean Tony would have Diana as another pseudo-aunt like Peggy? Cause then that first meeting between Cap and Iron Man would have gone a lot different in Avengers.

(How much do you wanna bet that Steve went in just as angry/resentful of Tony as Tony went in about “the guy my dad never shut up about” due to the Romanoff Report on Tony from IM2/all the vids of Tony flipping off a Senate subcommittee meeting…which probs would have made Steve like him, come to think of it.)

(Tony would have grown up hearing about too-stubborn-to-die, rules-are-for-people-not-me punk Steve, not the Captain up on Howard’s pedestal and felt good about knowing that even the small can win. Steve would have heard about baby Anthony, so smart and so alone, being constantly compared to a man who doesn’t really exist and been reminded of how everyone likes to forget tinyfighter!Steve existed))

(Just gonna bump this to another ask thread so it doesn’t get too long.)

This could go two ways, and to get to either direction, I think the starting path is relatively the same:

It’s implied in the DCU that Diana kind of fades into the ether and keeps a lower profile. This might be for many reasons, both external and internal. She was only involved in WWI for a very short time, and she was a lady to boot, so it’s very possible that command did not want it getting out that some female and some random spy saved them from a gas bombing. I think her involvement in WWII would then also be very under-the-radar. She’s living in France in modern-day DCU, so maybe moved there after WWI, and maybe she even helped rebuild that little town that was destroyed by the gas. Following that, she’d become a member of the French Resistance when Germany invaded. But it strikes me that she’s not terribly impressed by the men who wage war, and so any involvement she has with the Commandos and any of the Allied armies is on her terms and not under the umbrella of the military.

Now comes the split:

Way 1) THE NO ROMANCE WITH PEGGY WAY: For me, this means Diana is very much her own agent and likely disappears again after WWII. She may have fond feelings for the remaining Commandos and Howard Stark, but she’s not necessarily directly involved with them and because she’s not an agent of the Allies, she’s not going to go back to headquarters to keep fighting the war. This means she’d essentially (and probably purposefully, given that she doesn’t age) let the relationships fade away and only turn up when she found out Steve had been recovered. So in that scenario, no Aunt Diana, although potentially stories about her awesomeness would get passed on to Tony.

Way 2) THE ROMANCE WITH PEGGY WAY: In this, we definitely have Awesome Aunt Diana alongside Awesome Aunt Peggy, and given that we know how Diana feels about babies, I can’t imagine her not looking in on Tony even if Peggy is busy with running SHIELD. I feel like Diana’s presence in the Stark household would definitely soften many things, not least of all Howard, and her presence would also give Tony a second ally, an ally who is very invested in making sure Tony has a happy childhood and that he grows up to be a good man (he is already, but he’d be himself with less of that caustic “Fuck you” attitude). I think then it would go much like you describe, with less vitriol from Tony and Diana quietly in the background telling Steve everything Tony’s been through that he might not have known otherwise.

(From Reioka: Speaking of Florist/Tattoo Artist: Florist Tony moves into the vacant building next door and Steve takes over some cookies to greet him. Steve nearly face-plants when he sees a very beautiful Tony setting up a bouquet and blurts out "can I buy that?" to save face. Tony is flattered and tells him it's a hundred and fifteen dollars. All of the blood leaves Steve's face but Tony doesn't notice because he's putting the final touches on. "What the fuck" Bucky says when Steve lugs the flowers back.)

“What. Is that?”

Steve ignored Bucky and hauled the vase deeper into the shop, heaving it up with all his might and nearly pissing himself when the whole thing threatened to topple off the counter. It would’ve killed him if the damn thing broke now, after he’d hauled it all the way over with his own two skinny arms.

“Steve. What is that?”

“It’s a pack of PBR.” Steve groused, stepping back to stare at the massive bouquet. Even just seeing it again, only slightly worse for wear for being pressed against his face, made him grin like a dope.

“Why the hell would you bring this here? Why did you even buy this thing? Wait, have you got someone I don’t know about? Someone on the side? Stevie, we promised we’d share.”

“I don’t have someone on the side. I told you I was going to say hi to the new florist next door.”

“And he gave you half his shop?”

“I…I might’ve made an impulse buy.”

Bucky turned from the desk where he did the books, and raised one, very loud eyebrow at Steve. “How big of an impulse was this?”

“Uh…um, fifteen.”

“For that whole thing.” Bucky looked nonplussed.

“Fifteen. Plus a hundred.”

“A hundred and fifteen dollars, Stevie!”

“Shut it. I know.”

“A hundred and fifteen dollars for a bouquet that doesn’t even match the decor, Stevie?” Bucky gestured dramatically to the wrought iron gate at the front of the shop, the deep red walls and the diamond black-and-white floor tiles. “This is a tattoo parlor. What were you thinking?”

“You didn’t see the florist, Bucky.”

“Bullshit, you big softie.”

“I’m tellin’ you. Walk over there and say hi before you judge me.”

Bucky stood right up from his seat, and Steve had known him long enough to know he was going to do just that. “I’m going to go over there and say hi. Like you said. And when I get back, you’re gonna rub my feet for an hour because there’s no way whoever this is could be worth a hundred and fifteen dollars.”

“What do I get if I’m right?”

“You ain’t gonna be right,” Bucky tossed over his shoulder as he walked out the door.

“A blowjob then?” Steve could just see Bucky flipping him off.

Ten minutes later, the sound of the shop bell roused Steve from his sketchpad. He laughed so hard he nearly passed out when he saw Bucky carrying not one, but two massive bouquets.

(From Reioka: Just tell me when you get tired of these buddy: Tony in a pick-your-own tulip field, carefully cutting the stems with scissors like his mother taught him so long ago, and glancing up just in time to see this scrawny little blond sneeze so hard that he drops his armful of flowers. Tony stares, torn between laughing and offering help. "I'mb allergic," scrawny blond explains, wiping his nose. Tony is horrified. "Then why are you here?!" "I bean. Gotta ged flowers somehow." Tony is charmed. Somehow.)

No worries. I took a dinner break. And as some of my long-time followers can tell you, sometimes I take forever to get to an ask.

This hearkens to the flowershop/tattoo dichotomy for me, and I always love it when people assign Tony as the florist and Steve as the tattooist. I always want to push it a little further and say that Tony has a bit of plant magic in him, just enough that plants flourish under his care and the herbal tinctures and concoctions and teas he makes from them are always just a little more potent, and there’s something about them. Some ineffable thing.

Steve’s had Tony’s lavender tea. The first time he drank it, he said it tasted like laying on the grass on the first warm day of spring, and Tony laughed and said that was silly. The second time he had it, he said it was like helping his mom make cookies around Christmas time. Every time it tastes a little different to him, and he can never describe what that taste is like without going to some bizarre fuzzy metaphor.

Tony cultivates plants with trimmed stamens for Steve so that there’s never any pollen to worry about. They still produce nectar, so they still smell sweet and fresh, and Steve always asks him how he does it. He just shrugs a little and says he’s always had a knack.

His shop is light and green and sunshine and it always smells amazing, like earth and life, even in the dead of winter. He brews up tea after tea for the Rogers, anything to ease mother and son’s persistent coughing, aching ears, wheezing lungs. Mrs. Rogers swears she’s never seen anything like it in all her years as a nurse, watches with all the intent of a scientist making hypotheses as Tony makes the tinctures for her again and again, but she can never figure out just why his plants would be more potent than others, just why his teas and herbs have such a profound effect where others are mediocre at best.

(From Reioka: You know that Equestrian AU I sent you? Now I'm thinking of Steve actually being a jockey but he's just so enamored with how cute Tony is that he still answers like he did ("I'm in a horse event. With horses.") so Tony thinks he's totally lying about being a jockey until he actually meets Rembrandt lol.)

“Peggy, you mind if I show your friend around the horses?”

Peggy’s grin grows even wider and she winks and Steve blushes furiously. “Of course, Tony. Show him around all you want.”

She gives Steve a hard shove and off they go and then Steve’s really in trouble because now he has to pretend he has no idea what he’s doing around horses and he’s not sure he can fake it, but as it turns out, it’s been a long ass time since he sat in an English saddle and it’s the worst. He just wants to stand up in the stirrups the way he does for racing, and that sends him tumbling and Tony has a tiny heart-attack because the cute clueless blond just took a tumble at a plain walk.

“Oh my god, are you okay?”

Steve is more than okay. Steve is challenged. So he shoves Tony off and leaps right back up in that saddle, and now that he knows better, he changes his carriage and it’s not great, he can tell, but the horse suddenly realizes that he’s seating a rider who knows what he’s doing. Tony starts freaking out when Steve snatches the lead rein away and then sets off at a respectable trot that graduates into a canter. By the time Steve circles back around to Tony he’s adjusted his posture to get a smoother ride and he’s looking pretty proud of himself. Then he sees Tony’s face.

“I’m guessing you know the difference between English and Western riding after all.”

“Maybe a little,” Steve confesses, blushing fiercely and feeling a bit cowed.

“So what do you ride?”

“Neither. I’m a jockey.”

Tony’s skeptical irritation smooths away and he says, “That explains so much.”

“My horse’s name really is Rembrandt. You want to meet him? I’d let you ride him.”

“Is he here?”

“No, he’s back at my place.”

Tony squints at Steve for a long moment and then says, “Is Rembrandt your penis, because that sounded like a come on.”

Peggy, who’s just wandered over, just about dies laughing.

(From Reioka: You know what that last one was really sad so here: Tony is a champion equestrian. Steve is totally uninterested in horses but Peggy, who loves dressage, drags him to events because he lost a bet one time and she continues to hold it over him gleefully. Tony sees this adorable, tiny blond and mistakes him for a jockey and starts talking horses with him. Steve LIES THROUGH HIS TEETH because Tony is also adorable. Tony is even more adorable when he realizes his mistake and blushes and apologizes.)

Listen, give me Peggy Carter on a horse. Oh my god, the very thought. I’m weak in the knees. For that matter, Haley Atwell on a horse. Jeezums, be still my beating heart.

On to the AU!

Tony would totally be a great equestrian. It fits his background so well, such a prim and proper thing for the son of a rich business empire. I picture him riding English style, but having always secretly envied Western style riders because there’s something about cowboys that makes him a little hot and bothered. Can you imagine him in those riding pants? Tony’s perfect bubble butt and the pants.

And he’s damn good at riding, too. He’s small enough, but strong enough, and he loves his horse. He loves tech, but he also spends his off days designing riding equipment and he’s in the stables every day to ride and care for Excelsior, his chestnut gelding.

And then there’s city boy Steve who thinks that the only place horses ought to be is far away from him, but he loves Peggy, even if it didn’t work out between them romantically, and he’ll literally bend over backwards for her. So he puts up with her “dumb overgrown carrot-eating dogs” because she begs him to come and see her perform, and then he sees this amazing guy and his horse jumping the fences and something in him just lurches and he’s not the only one.

Once Tony clears the end of the track and is waiting for his scoring announcement, he notices a little guy standing off to the side with Peggy Carter. His first thought is “new competition” and his second thought is “yes please.” He dismounts and trots Excelsior over because he’s gonna make a good impression on this amazing little jockey and clearly he is because jockey looks like he’s about to swallow his tongue.

“You here with Peggy? You in one of the events?”

“I, uh, yeah. Yeah. Yes I am. I am in an event.”

And Peggy, who’s just walked up behind him, grins and knows she’s going to have fun. “Tony, lovely to see you. This is my friend Steve. He loves horses and racing.”

“Oh? Nice to meet you, Steve. What event are you entered in?”

“I’m…I’m in a horse event. With horses.”

“He runs the barrels,” Peggy supplies and Steve resists the urge to turn and give her a look because what the hell does that even mean?

“Yep,” he says instead. “Barrels.”

“Ooh, a Western rider,” Tony says, and he has a niggling suspicion, but Peggy looks like the cat who got the canary and Steve is clearly trying hard, so he goes with it a little while longer. “I’d love to meet your horse.”

“Right. My horse. My horse who is named…uh, Rembrandt.”

“Like the toothpaste?”

“Like the artist.”

“So can I meet him?”

“Sure he’s…he’s right over there.” Steve gestures at a horse about twenty feet away hitched to the fence, and Tony resists the urge to giggle, because that horse is done up in an English saddle, and is a mare, and he knows her, because she belongs to Carol Danvers. But he nods and turns back to Steve with the biggest eyes.

“Will you show me her?”

And Steve is doomed, because he’s gonna do it. He’s gonna pretend this dumb overgrown carrot-eating dog is his and he’s gonna try and act like he loves it all so he can impress Tony. So he leads Tony and Excelsior over and starts attempting to pet Marvel, which goes about as well as Tony expected, given that Marvel is notoriously mischievous. She’s got Steve’s hair in her mouth in two seconds flat and in no time, Steve’s sporting a horse-slobber hairdo.

It only gets better when Carol shows up and says, “Tony? Why is this man molesting my horse?”

Tony can’t keep it together at this point anymore and he bursts out laughing and Steve is mortified.

“You were so cute, though, trying to look like you knew what you were talking about. Do you even know the difference between English and Western riding?”

“…The hats?”

Tony snorts and mumbles, “I guess you’re not wrong,” and then he says, “You wanna try riding Excelsior? I’ll lead you around a little.”

And Steve steels himself, because for this amazing guy named Tony, apparently he’s going to ride a dumb overgrown carrot-eating dog.

(From Reioka: How about an AU where Steve works at a coffee cart in the park and he is absolutely enamored with this cute guy that goes roller-skating (on actual old-fashioned roller-skates oh my God) every morning and evening walking this big dumb dog. And sometimes Skating Cutie stops for coffee and Steve always says something stupid and honestly he's so embarrassed why does Skating Cutie keep coming back? Steve wouldn't. (Tony thinks Coffee Guy is adorable, especially when he says something stupid.))

I’m gonna call this the cutest AU idea ever. Calling it. Nothing will ever be cuter. I love this for multiple reasons. Steve is fair-skinned, so if he’s gonna be working a coffee cart out in the park, he’s gonna be slathered in sunscreen and wearing a big dorky hat in the summer, and in winter, he’s gonna be bundled up in the fattest parka you can imagine with a scarf wrapped tight around his neck and a thick hat and ear muffs and ginormous mittens with those flippy bits over the fingers and he’s just gonna look dorky and beautiful, and then he’s going to be even dorkier because he can never manage to say anything suave to the Skating Cutie.

“Just plain black, please,” says Skating Cutie.

“Plain?” says Steve. “Plain, like nothing in it?”

“Uh-huh,” Skating Cutie says with a smirk.

“That’s what plain means.”

“Oh. Oh right. Right. Plain black.”

Or “Can I get an Americano?”

“You mean an a America-yes?”

“What?”

“No, I asked you.”

“Nothing. It’s nothing. Just…one Americano. Coming right up.”

And Steve blushes so prettily, and he’s already red-cheeked anyway because that’s just how his skin works with heat or cold or anything, but it gets worse when Skating Cutie stops by. And then, oh god, summer’s the worst, because Skating Cutie wears crop tops and Steve really didn’t need to be thinking about Skating Cuties nice abs or the little happy trail beneath his belly button or his booty in those shorts.

And his dog! Or maybe not his dog? But the dog! Is the biggest, boofiest, sweetest dog Steve’s ever met, and so well-behaved too. She just sits there and watches the two of them while Steve tries to be suave and smooth, and then sometimes–he swears she does this on purpose–she will somehow get behind the cart and wrap her leash around his legs and then there’s nothing for it but to get nose to nose with Skating Cutie while he tries to untangle himself and he’s dying. He’s literally dying with the weight of this crush.

It’s six months of torture before Skating Cutie finally says, “So, are you ever actually gonna ask me out or what?”

And all Steve can manages is, “I mean, you, I , we, there’s a, you’re interested?”

“Name’s Tony. You free tonight?”

(From Reioka: Natasha HATES watching Steve and Tony bicker. She knows it's just their personalities, and they love each other underneath it all, but dear GOD is it annoying listening to them snipe at each other and inevitably hit too close to home and then they stop talking to each other but both start talking to her until they work it out. It's very tiring. Just because she helped them get together doesn't mean she's their relationship's nursemaid. So when Bucky and Sam get together she screams bloody murder)

(Oh no. Oh no. I have sad ideas about this. Sad ahoy!)

Tony Stark and Steve Rogers have never heard Natasha Romanov yell ever. Not in the five years of knowing her. Not when the world was ending or when a villain was getting away or when the quinjet was about to crash. At most, Natasha would give a slightly louder grunt or command. Not yelling. So when she slammed her coffee cup down on the kitchen table and shouted, “ENOUGH!” they both shut the hell up. And waited. In her bathrobe, shoulders hunched, hot coffee splattered over her hands and the table, she looked less like an assassin and more like a sitcom housewife. And yet there was something in the line of her body, the way her hair fell down to curtain her eyes, that made everyone in the kitchen suddenly and immensely afraid to breathe.

“You,” she hissed finally, pointing at Tony. “You are a coward. You have someone, someone you love. He’s standing right there. And he loves you, too. And all you can do is doubt him and push him away because you’re afraid.” She spits the word like a curse.

“And you!” Steve flinched as she rounded on him. “You hide everything from everyone. You stare at us and keep it in and keep it in and keep it in until it explodes with monumental stupidity.” It was like being slapped in the face, the way she spat her words at him. “You are lucky to have each other, so why don’t you grow up and act like it.”

It would have been better if she’d stomped out, but she was silent as an owl sweeping away, and in her wake, Tony and Steve felt smaller, younger, and stupider than they’d felt in a long time. Even Clint, sitting on a bar stool and uninvolved with the argument, felt himself shrinking inward. After a painful silence which stretched so long Tony thought he’d seen the morning shadows move, Clint rose and poured out a coffee refill and a fresh mug. “She’s never told me much about it. Just enough that I know there was someone. Someone she cared about. And she lost them. Never got to tell them.”

He left with the mugs, and Tony and Steve remained, cowed and ashamed.

“I do love you, Steve. I…I know I don’t say it enough.”

“Shut up,” Steve hissed, stepping in close to sweep Tony into a hug. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

(Nat is never as worried about Sam and Bucky. Their words are like gentle friendly elbowing, good-natured and carefully meted. When one or the other is hurting, they’re better about protecting each other, not digging in with precision strikes. They’re still annoying as hell, though, and she separates them on the quinjet, because otherwise it’s like listening to toddlers argue in the back seat.)

(From Reioka: Now for stuckony: Steve and Bucky are recovering from their service so Sam sets them up teaching a cooking class (and if Bucky gets overwhelmed he can focus on his dish). They actually enjoy it. It works for them, and they enjoy watching people learn to make new dishes. Enter Tony, our favorite walking disaster. Every single damn dish he tries to make is ruined somehow. Steve and Bucky think he's flirting. Tony is actually just an awful cook but hey he's dating two good cooks now so that's okay.)

This dovetails nicely with that last ask about Bucky and cooking. (Technically, my fic One Date Wonder could fit in with this too. Hmmm…)

But just imagine. The cooking class starts out super easy. It was advertised for beginners, college kids, twenty-somethings who just never got around to learning how to cook. And then there’s Tony at the back who is thirty-coughs-into-his-hand-so-you-can’t-hear-the-rest. And they do start easy. Pancakes. Who can fuck up pancakes? Tony Stark apparently, if the black column of smoke coming from his griddle is any indication. They’re supposed to be paired up for the cooking class, but there’s an odd number and so Tony’s just working on his own, freaking out next to Bucky and Steve’s cooking station. And Bucky and Steve have military training, so of course they step in. Bucky’s got the fire extinguisher and Steve’s not doing too bad a job of comforting Tony. “You want to help us out? You can watch how we do it and maybe that’ll help you.” So Tony does, and he manages to make three only moderately blackened pancakes (”You’ve got the heat too high, you’ve got to turn it down”) and the night seems like an okay success.

Until next week when they try pesto. “Tony, there’s literally no heat on the sauce. You just blend it. How did you manage to burn the basil.” “Aren’t you supposed to cook it first? To make it safe?” “Oh my god, you helpless adorable man.” Tony squeaks and Steve claps a hand to his mouth. “I’m so sorry. That was totally inappropriate.” And Bucky is just standing back watching and shaking his head because his boyfriend is freaking hopeless. Later on, Steve apologizes and Bucky just shakes his head some more. “No. He is adorable. But he might not be up for poly, so maybe just back down a little.”

The week after that is homemade pizza (”Not as difficult as you think!” proclaims the teacher, and Tony whimpers.) Within ten minutes, Tony’s pizza dough has somehow expanded and is in the process of swallowing his entire work table. “What do we do?” Steve whispers, horrified. “Um, run? That thing looks like it might be sentient.” The teacher comes over and somehow manages to wrangle Tony’s dough away, but by that time it’s too late, so he forlornly ends up at Steve and Bucky’s table again, watching as they punch down their dough and sauce it. Later that night, Bucky says, “No one can possibly be this bad at cooking. It’s gotta be…like an act, right? He must be faking it. Do you think he’s flirting with us?” “Well, he did blush very prettily when I called him adorable.”

So the week after that, when Tony manages to crack shells from ever egg straight into his omelet, Bucky puts him out of his misery and says, “Do you want to go out to dinner with us after this? Since you can’t eat your omelet. And since you’re cute.”

It’s only after they’ve moved in together several months later that Tony’s terrible cooking wasn’t a haphazard flirting method. He really was just that bad at cooking.

(From Reioka: Hello I am here. How about dual Steve/Tony and Pepper/Nat but they're not out because it could hurt the company so for events Tony shows up with Natasha and Pepper with Steve. There's a huge hubbub in the media over who is the cuter couple--Sweet As Pie Steve and Pepper (lmao the public have no idea how wrong they are) or Suave, Sexy, and Terrifying Tony and Pepper (lmao same). Natasha and Steve are unexpectedly competitive about it. Tony and Pepper don't understand but think it's hilarious.)

*narrows eyes* I think one of those Peppers was supposed to be a Nat. But let’s go!

See the really fun thing with this is they switch up every now and then. Nat will hop over to Tony’s arm and Pepper will grab Steve’s and then the media really has a time of it: Tony Stark’s Redhead Addiction. Steve Rogers Steals the CEO, Natasha Romanov: Actual Black Widow? Pepper Potts: Use ‘Em and Lose ‘Em Cougar. Tony thinks the headlines are fucking hilarious, as does Nat. Pepper tolerates them but rarely comments because she’s classy like that. Steve, of course, is mortified to be accused of essentially trading girlfriends, but he tolerates the madness because it amuses Tony and Nat so much.

He never expected to get into the madness himself. “American as Apple Pie? They do know you’re Russian, right?”

“Since when have the tabloids ever cared about accuracy.”

“We need a different headline.”

“Oh? How far do you want to push it?”

“Why do you ask?”

…

“Public Indecency: Romanogers Frisky on the Red Carpet. Well,” Tony wolf-whistles and Steve blushes redder, “I confess I wasn’t expecting Steve to be the one to get exposed.”

“I don’t even know how she got my shirt off.”

Nat, sitting placidly in Pepper’s lap, smiles slyly. “Trade secret.”

“I do have a beef though,” Tony says. “How come you guys get a cute celebrity nickname. Why don’t we have one of those Pep?”

“Because we’re not really dating?”

“As far as the media knows.”

…

Tony frames the next cover in the entertainment room: Po-rk: Tony Stark and Virginia Potts Hot Sex Tape Revealed.

“You are the most incorrigible boyfriend,” Steve groans, biting Tony gently on the shoulder.

“You love it.”

This is kind of in response to a thing I was reading about angry bitter Steve, and just my own thoughts on Steve (and also a little on Tony). I’m not interested in wank, okay? We all have our own interpretations and that’s the beauty of fandom, right?

I think it’s fairly well-known and accepted amongst fans that Steve Rogers is an angry, angry man. But the root of his anger seems to vary across fandom. From my own perspective I don’t think he’s angry because he’s a fundamentally bitter man. I really don’t. I think it’s because he’s disappointed and frustrated when the world doesn’t live up to what he believes it can be. When he sees big government organizations using their power to monitor civilians rather than protect them, or when he sees a charismatic leader use his power to destroy those who are different rather than to embrace diversity, I think that’s really fundamentally hard for Steve to see because in his own view, that’s something he himself would never do. (Whether he has anyway is a different issue.)

Steve bucks against the Accords because he doesn’t understand why he would need to be monitored. He’d never do anything evil; he’d only ever try to help. And in his heart, he believes other heroes wouldn’t either. When they prove him wrong, when they make decisions that he sees as misguided and oppressive, it makes him angry because he thought they were above this kind of deception.

Is Steve’s faith in institutions completely gone? I’m not sure. My historical knowledge of his character and the perspectives he might’ve had make me skeptical of the idea that Steve would give up on institutions entirely. (Talking about that letter at the end of CA:CW here.) The things that would’ve been helping Steve up pre-serum were all institutions, and very socialist ones at that, things that our current American government would balk at, things that would never even make it out of Congressional committee. So maybe where Steve’s faith is lost is in the military-industrial complex? This one I’m more murky on.

But one of the points that I want to just touch on here is that Steve’ often externalizes his anger (even though his standards for goodness in humanity are perhaps unrealistically high). SHIELD? That’s on Fury and his failure to eradicate evil from his organization sooner. Ultron? That’s on Tony and Bruce and their notion that the Avengers won’t be enough. The Accords? That’s on Tony and the military-industrial complex.

Tony, on the other hand, often internalizes blame. SI selling under the table? His fault. Ultron? His fault. Vanko? His fault. I don’t think Tony necessarily believes that institutions are faultless, but he sees their value. He sees that a lot of good can be done with them, and he is more willing to compromise to get a non-ideal result than no result at all. It’s the difference between all-or-nothing and 60/40 split. So long as Tony can get the 60, he’ll take it. Hell, sometimes he takes less than the 60 if it’s someone he likes. He sacrifices a lot for the team after all.

Sorry these two are so different in tone, but that's just how they were ordered over on Tumblr

(In response to Reioka's prompt: The Avengers are people that meet in group therapy led by Sam. Sam suggests Tony join them. Tony can never bring himself to say anything during group because how is his trauma supposed to compare to combat veterans, and victims of human trafficking, and extensive child abuse? Tony doesn't belong here. He's just some rich asshole that got kidnapped and waterboarded. (The other Avengers can see it's tearing him apart tho. They want to help, if only Tony would let them.))

I think this is probably something Tony definitely struggles with for real. I think he looks at the things Steve and Nat and Bruce and Clint and Thor have been through, the things Wanda and Bucky and even T’Challa have been through and thinks to himself, “I’m just a spoiled rich boy who got what he deserved. I was negligent and self-centered and willfully ignorant. What right have I got to suffer?” I’m pretty sure Tony stomps his feelings down so hard that the only way he knows how to deflect is with humor because that’s all he’s ever had.

So when anyone brings up feelings or the fact that Tony seems like he’s having a hard time, he laughs it off. He deflects. He throws out a joke and a grin and he changes the subject. Steve gets steered off for a little while. His first impression of Tony wasn’t a good one and Tony’s file was missing key information that Steve later finds out from Nat. Once Steve knows the truth, knows what Tony went through, what he suspects Tony still hasn’t shared with them, he’s a bit more aware of those moments when Tony throws up the shields.

Bruce is another one to deflect, so he sees through Tony right away. The difference between them, though, is that when pushed, Bruce will share. He will overshare. So he tries not to bring it up if he can help it, but on the bad nights, he’ll share and hope that by sharing, he’s encouraging Tony and showing Tony that it’s all right to open up to friends. (We’re ignoring that end credits scene in IM3, right? Because that was callous.)

Thor… Thor is a special customer. It’s easy for all the Avengers, for everyone, to forget that Thor is thousands of years old. He’s still young by Asgardian standards, and it takes a hell of a long time for Asgardians to mature, but he’s still wiser than anyone gives him credit for. He plows right through Tony’s reflections with the gentlest and kindest of touches. He’ll put an arm around Tony and say something so quiet and so weirdly perfect that Tony will just stop for a moment and stare, and then he’ll shrug and change the subject, but he never forgets what Thor says.

Clint is pretty fucked up, but years in the army and years with Nat and Coulson have done a lot to ease him up. He doesn’t deflect anymore, but he doesn’t exactly open up easily either. But on those nights when they’re all sitting at the table at 2AM, Clint is the rawest. He’s the one who just lets everything hang out, no matter how uncomfortable it makes the others. Tony admires that, even if he can’t ever imagine himself doing it.

Nat, strangely, is the person who is most able to coax it out of Tony. She’s seen him at some of his lowest points, and she’s never cut him any quarter, but she’s also never sneered at him when he didn’t deserve it. In some ways, he trusts her judgement because he knows she’s hardest of all of them. If she believed he were undeserving, he’d know it. When he does finally manage to open up to an Avenger, it’s her, and she doesn’t placate him. She doesn’t tell him it’s gonna be all right. She just sits with him and shares a little of herself. Not a lot. Just enough.

----

Does anybody think about what an absolute drama queen Steve Rogers is? “Where you from?” he asks Spidey and the kid, who’s currently stuck holding up several thousand pounds of equipment, squeaks “Queens” and then #1 Troll Steve Rogers has the gall to announce “Brooklyn” like the entire United States doesn’t know that Steve Rogers is from Brooklyn. I bet he announced it every time he did an interview. And not even subtly, either.

“So, what’s surprised you the most about the modern era?” (Steve has answered this question in interviews approximately 629,875 times.)

“Oh, I guess the gentrification? Brooklyn–that’s where I’m from, you know–it used to be rougher. Now they charge a new Lexus’ worth for a month’s rent.”

“What do you do in your spare time?”

“Well, back before, I used to sneak in to watch the Dodgers. You know, back when they were in Brooklyn. Where I’m from.”

“Yes, but what about now?”

“Oh, I like to ride my motorcycle out to Brooklyn. I was born there.”

*Host narrows eyes, unsure if he’s being made fun of. He’s totally being made fun of.*

I know for CAWS we’ve all basically decided that Peggy was in DC, but just consider that deleted scene from the Avengers where her address is listed in Manchester and how her funeral was in the UK, too, and reimagine a CAWS where Peggy was in the UK after all and then think about Steve flying to the UK once a month just to see her and flying straight back because he’s got to report for duty the next day and think about how he doesn’t get enough sleep those days and his eyes are dry and aching from the airplane and think about how being in the UK makes him sad for other reasons because it’s where he and the commandos took shore leave and think about him thinking about that dance in that pub that he and Peggy never had and then cry a lot.

----

Days, weeks, really, like the past few are the kind that make me want to become a mountain hermit and never speak to another human being ever again.

But because I don’t just want to be whinging, let me share with you this headcanon which may or may not be inspired by autobiographical events.

—

Tony gets panic attacks. Really bad ones. The first few times Steve saw them, he’s wasn’t quite sure what to do, and was kind of just shoved to the side as Pepper or Rhodey or Nat shoved in to count Tony through breathing. Steve tries the count, but he gets just as riled up as Tony, so it’s not exactly calming for either of them. Instead he tries a different angle. The next time Tony starts shaking and hyperventilating, Steve says “Tell me how the weight to fuel ratio affects rockets when they’re trying to leave the atmosphere.” Tony blinks at him, and then blinks again, and between shaking breaths he says, “The weight’s everything.” “Good. Tell me more.” “Too heavy. Can’t fly.” “So how do you keep from being too heavy.” “Cut down on weight.” At first it’s just short replies. One or two word sentences. But Steve is persistent. He asks the most innocuous questions; Tony’s too freaked to tease him. He just answers, hones that amazing brain and aims it until it’s completely focused on one subject. And not focused on anything else. And slowly he comes down and describes to Steve how scientists calculate payloads and fuel efficiency. The next time he has a panic attack, Steve asks about temperature balance in the jet boots. The time after that, how touch-screens sense skin and why do those little touch finger gloves work. The time after that, how JARVIS reads gestures and facial expressions. The time after that…

----

Tony texting Steve: 🍆🍆🍆🍆👍😏

Steve: *stares at text for a minute* Hey Nat? Does this mean Tony wants eggplant Parmesan for dinner?

Nat: …Yes, Steve. That’s exactly what he wants.

----

(In response to a request to send the Avengers to IKEA.)

I have a confession to make. I’ve never found IKEA instructions difficult. It always makes perfect sense to me how things are supposed to go together, but I know there are a lot of people out there who struggle with them and I’m pretty sure there a few fics and art pieces floating around where the Avengers argue over IKEA construction, but for me, I figure if I, a pretty average woman can figure those diagrams out, they’re probably nothing for Tony. I imagine he probably finds them pleasing because they’re a relatively mindless task for him where his hands are going but his brain can be thinking on other things.

I think the Tony probably takes the Avengers to IKEA for the experience of it, and I feel like Nat and Clint stand back and hide outside the path (they’re brave enough to stray from the path) and take video which they will later upload to Youtube and frighten the bejesus out of people while Tony and Bruce amble along and play tour guides. I think Steve and Thor would be delighted, Steve especially because of IKEAs incredibly utilitarian approach to things. I think they’d buy too much lingonberry jam and too many meatballs and Steve would come home with a plan to make the Avengers’ living space as organized as humanly possible. All the organizers. All of them.

Whenever anyone on the team is feeling down, Steve leaves them little post-it note doodles to cheer them up. Natasha calls them Captain-grams.

----

People think Steve keeps sensible things like zip ties and flash bombs in all of his utility pouches, and he does, but he also keeps some unexpected things. Lollipops for kids who are crying because they’ve been thrust into hell by some asshole supervillain. Dog treats to tempt dogs who’ve escaped in the chaos. A couple sets of stickers because sometimes fans like them more than getting Steve’s signature. Some chewing gum because Steve just happens to like chewing gum and Tony’s always bumming pieces off of him. Hair ties for anyone who forgets one. He likes being prepared not just for disaster, but for life.

----

The ice cream in the fridge keeps disappearing. Clint’s the first suspect but it’s not him. He doesn’t like ice cream headaches and cookies are more his purview. Thor’s next to be accused after that, but he has his own dedicated fridge and he understands the sacredness of one’s own food. He would never steal from his teammates. Rhodey, Sam, Bucky, Bruce, Wanda. One after another they are all accused and one after another they all take it in good humor right up until they don’t. Tony and Nat (the two who keep ice cream stashes) are stumped, and JARVIS refuses to tattle on the thief. Eventually Tony decides that Nat must be the thief and she’s fibbing about her missing stash and Nat decides the same about Tony.

…

It’s Steve. The thief is Steve.

----

(In response to the idea that Steve Rogers is magically summoned anytime any one of the female Avengers is feeling down and out. One of them tries to tell him she's just on her period to get him to stop hovering, but it backfires.)

But at the same time someone (my vote is Maria Hill) tells him about all the bullshit that goes into and along with women’s sanitary products and Steve becomes outraged. He brings it up luxury taxes and toxic shock syndrome in interviews apropos of nothing and everyone on the team watches with spectator’s glee as news anchor’s faces go redder and redder. Steve once made Bill O’Reilly so embarrassed he left the room.

And then, when other teammates are asked about his behavior (in ways clearly hoping they’ll condemn Steve) they respond with other questions designed to create the ultimate FOX reporter discomfort. Tony starts in on the marginalizing of pan, ace, and bisexual identities. Bruce brings up uncomfortable statistics about how menstruation affects women who don’t have access to sanitary products, and then often goes onto statistics and facts about pregnancy, mentioning the vaginal canal as many times as humanly possible. Nat starts asking about genitalia the same way trans people are asked, and she will frequently interject about North Carolina’s ridiculous bathroom laws. Clint’s personal favorite topic is accessibility, especially for people with invisible disabilities. Sam’s brings up the lack of streamlining and communication between the VA and the military, and the dearth of support for returning veterans. Wanda’s go-to is America’s shameful views toward refugees and the lack of reparations that are made in spite of civilian casualties resultant from American actions. Thor talks about gender identities on Asgard and often gleefully veers off into societally accepted polyamory. Bucky, for whatever reason, starts asking why the hell circumcision has become the norm in the US.

After two months of madness, FOX stops inviting the Avengers in for interviews. In fact, they stop reporting on the Avengers altogether. There is permanent trauma among the anchors. Brett Baier was allegedly spotted in a bar simply repeating the words “penile mucosa,” but there’s no video evidence. (There’s totally video evidence and Tony gleefully gave it to Bucky.)

Bruce Banner is a troll and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. At press conferences, he regularly growls and grunts into the microphone when he starts hearing a few too many questions he doesn’t like, and then plays it off like an accident. “Ms. Romanov, you have an absolutely fantastic figure. Tell us about your diet regimen!”

*snort, growl, cracking of knuckles* “I’m sorry, I was interrupting your incredibly rude question.”

“Mr. Stark, do you honestly expect us to believe that you, a well-documented drunken playboy, have truly reformed yourself?”

*growl, grumble, bare teeth, cough* “Oh. I’m sorry. I was just feeling a little…irritated.”

Avengers press conferences soon become the least newsworthy events on the planet because most of the reporters are too terrified to ask more than, “So what did you have for breakfast today?” Soon, the press conferences cease altogether.

----

Natasha is the first one to move into the tower, and she doesn’t sneak in. She knocks like a normal person (if you can call asking JARVIS to let her in ‘knocking’), a half-starved, limping Clint draped over her shoulder. Tony welcomes them in without a word and immediately calls for takeout. By the time he gets back from the kitchen, Natasha’s passed out on the couch, Clint in her lap.

----

For months after Bucky moves into the Tower, the only person he’ll speak with is Natasha, and then only in Russian. Strangely enough, it’s kind, jovial, Thor who shimmies in through the cracks of someone who badly wants to be human again. And he does it in true Asgardian fashion, by challenging him to an arm wrestling contest.

----

When Natasha finds out Steve doesn’t know how to dance, she makes it her new goal to introduce him to every fad that’s appeared since he went down in the ice. Steve never takes to the lessons, but (perhaps unsurprisingly) Thor and Vision both become avid swing dancers.

----

Every once and a while, the ladies of the tower need time away from the sausage fest. There’s an annual poker night whenever at least four of them are in New York at the same time. Pepper, Hill, Nat, Helen, Jane, Darcy, Wanda, and on rare occasion Lady Sif, sitting around a table, drinking wine and champagne, eating chocolate, and pretending that they can beat Natasha at cards.

Steve and Bucky make up slang words and then use them around the tower, trying to convince the others that they were real terms used in the 30s and 40s. On any given day, you can hear things like “Holy Popoky, Tony, this new interface is amazing.” or “Fox News really steams my cabbage.”

----

Natasha doesn’t keep a lot for herself. Her apartment is spartan, done entirely in neutral colors, like it was plucked out a design catalog. But in her master bath, she keeps shelves upon shelves of bath salts and solutions acquired on missions all over the world, and once a week, she treats herself to a good long soak with a book. The boys know better than to disturb her.

----

Thor is a neatfreak. Sure he breaks glasses and mugs on the floor, but he always meticulously picks up after himself. He says gleaming floors and clear glass remind him of home. His private quarters are spotless, shining, and always smell faintly of lemon and cloves. Tony finds pieces of wooden furniture that carry the same scent all over the tower and he can only assume that Thor has taken to late-night woodwork polishing.

----

Clint always wrangles the kids when they’re evacuating civilians, and he always watches over any huddles of kids whose parents have yet to find them. Not just because he’s good with them, but also just because he loves kids. All of them. He loves to make them laugh, and he hates to see them cry. He keeps a set of juggling balls attached to the bottom of his quiver, and when all those kids are crying and terrified, he does juggling tricks for them to make them feel better.

----

Tony Stark never excelled at the humanities. Literature didn’t interest him (save for scifi and the potential to seed invention ideas), philosophy was a snooze, and while he soaked up languages like a sponge, he never particularly enjoyed them. But he loves, loves, loves music. And not just the classic rock he’s got blaring in his workshop. He loves classical. He loves jazz. He loves old-timey standards and electronica. He even loves that stupid bubble gum pop on the top forty charts (though he'd never admit it even under torture.)

He loves playing the piano because when he looks at the keys, he doesn’t just see Bach and Beethoven. He sees harmonic frequencies and clashing sound waves and mathematical possibilities. He sees the Golden Ratio and pi and the Pythagorus constant. (It doesn’t hurt that his mother taught him piano, either.) He’ll never tell the other Avengers, but sometimes when he’s the only one awake, and he can’t focus on code anymore, he’ll slip into the lounge, open up the piano, and play.